Rory: [00:00:00] Hey, we have a special treat for you today. One of my dear friends, Lou Parker is a six time Emmy award-winning journalist. This woman is brilliant and funny and insightful. Um, she is on live television and has been for years, like 20 hours every single week. Uh, she also is a former Miss USA, so we’ll talk about how she went from teacher to miss USA to award-winning journalist. And she has covered things in the major news cycle, presidential shins. Um, she’s covered the, uh, January 6th Life insurrection whole situation, school shootings. Uh, she’s won awards for some of her detective journalism around, uh, res rescuing animals and animal rights. And she’s just a delightful human. And what we’re gonna talk about is a little bit about what it takes to be successful on camera, uh, things around what you need to know about when you’re doing live productions, and also more about finding your voice [00:01:00] and, and having the confidence to say what you really believe. And sort of bringing your offline personality into the online world, uh, and vice versa. So anyways, Lou, welcome to the show, Craig. Lu: Thanks. Super happy to be here and really happy to be in person. Who knew I was gonna be in Nashville? I know this worked out, so, so they’re really good. I felt like, uh, you guys reached out to me about the book. I had been thinking about you guys prior. ’cause I always thought I would come here one day and. And, you know, see you guys at some point and then it all just kind of converged into today. So I’m, I am happy to be here and it, it is nice embalming here in Nashville. Rory: Yes. It’s, uh, it’s, but Lu: beautiful, humid in the summertime. Yes. Yeah. It’s fun. Rory: So I, I wanna start with, um, miss USA and, and I, I know you don’t do as much in that world, but that was a big part of your life, uh, for a while. And, and I wanna know. What does Miss USA not prepare you for? So you win something like that. Mm-hmm. [00:02:00] Um, I think it certainly has done a lot, you know, it set, set your career in a certain direction. Maybe what does it not prepare you for winning? Winning something like that. And what people might think, oh, you’re definitely gonna learn this, but maybe you didn’t. Or this, it’s definitely gonna lead to this, but maybe it didn’t. Lu: Gosh, that’s a great question. And that, um. I, I was open to it all when I, when I won the pageant. So the first thing that popped into my head is that walking into a room, I didn’t expect that I would learn how to do that to any room. Right? To a room that has two like huge name celebrities that I’m meeting as Miss USA or walking into a conference that had 10,000 people and I’m going on stage and I’m young at that time, you know, I was like a little southern girl. With a big accent and just a former teacher and just happy I was, I had an innocence back then. That was so awesome. You know, [00:03:00] um, as Miss USA walking in to any of those rooms, I think that’s where I learned a lot of my confidence. But I, what you don’t know is just that, wow, this, I didn’t know all that was gonna be happening. I thought I would just win the pageant and. Um, to be honest, I don’t know if I knew what would happen if I won the pageant, what I was expecting Rory: to be. Were you super confident going into the pageant or were you nervous about it? Like, Lu: well, you’re always nervous, obviously. Um, but I had a great, I met this guy randomly at a hair salon. I was getting my hair done, um, or something. I was working with this lady, uh, who was a friend of mine and there was a guy who did hair and he overheard me say that I was handwriting. My application. ’cause back then you didn’t submit it with emails or anything that didn’t exist. ’cause I won in 1994. Uh, and so it was really interesting and he was like, girl, you can’t hand write your application. You need to type it. Long story short, he started [00:04:00] working with me, new pageants, um, did it for free. I had no money. Um, he just wanted to be a part of it. And he ultimately taught me manifesting. Right? Like he didn’t know he was teaching me manifesting. But I had confidence going into that pageant so much, miss South Carolina and Miss USA, and ultimately competing at Miss Universe as Miss USA, because he said, and I remember, it always sticks with me. He said, when you leave this house, when I was a teacher, he said, when you leave this house and you go to the post office box, if you go to school to teach, if you’re going to the gym, you walk out with a crown already on your head. Both: Mm. Lu: Right. You already are. Miss USA. Just know that, feel the crown on your head. And so that is what gave me the confidence. So when I was, and you’re not there to win this congeniality too, ’cause I want to be like, Hey everybody, you’re not there to win Miss Congeniality, you’re there to win the pageant. Right? Which was a little bit of a struggle for me ’cause I had to stay super focused and not get diverted [00:05:00] by having fun. But I did, to answer your question, I did. I did have a lot of confidence and was nervous. ’cause you’re on stage in front. But you Rory: were embracing that identity from before it happened. Yes. Which, which I think is something we see consistently, whether that’s in sports or going to war. Yes. Or becoming a bestselling author or a world renowned speaker. It’s like if you can’t see it in your mind first Yes. Mm-hmm. The likelihood of it ever happening in real life. To me is like less than zero. Like it never accidentally happens. I never meet someone who has competed on a global stage or a national stage like that, and then not say like, I saw it first. Yes. It’s almost like you have to believe it in your mind before it can ever become a reality. So did, did you also see that about tv? So did you, did you see yourself like, Ooh, I’m gonna be a journalist, I’m going to be on, I’m gonna be on tv. In one of the biggest markets in the world like Los Angeles? Like did you always see that or was [00:06:00] that more accidental? Hundred percent not. Oh, it was accidental. And Lu: back to your original question, that is probably the answer, is that what I didn’t see that was gonna happen by winning this USA, was that I was going to become a journalist. Mm-hmm. Because I had no idea I would ever be in TV or want to be in tv. Like that was so off. My radar 100%, but it was in the cards. Um, I was living in LA because when I won Miss USA, they moved you to Los Angeles. So I was living there for the year, fell in love with California, lived for a year as Miss USA, then you have to give it up. And then I stayed in LA and started doing like dilly dally acting classes. And I was a horrible actress. Like I hated it. I was horrible like. So embarrassed that I even like took classes. But I had an agent at the time who was, you know, sending me out on all these, uh, acting things, and she said, Hey, there were these trades that you can look at where jobs are [00:07:00] available. Again, on paper, not, not online. And it said there’s an education reporter’s job available at the CVS affiliate in Charleston, South Carolina, where I’m originally from, and who had also followed me to the Miss USA and Universe Pageant. Now, did they create that to entice me? Did it just appear because that was my path? We’ll never know. Um, went back to interview with them and. Three times and told them no three times. ’cause I didn’t want to leave la Mm. And I didn’t want to come back. So I was like, if I come back, like, and, but I ultimately talked to my acting coach at the time and he said, and he’s, and this is great advice as well, just in general, he said, uh, if you’re, as long as you’re on camera, you’re working right. So no matter what it is, you’re working Right. As opposed to sitting out here. Now he could have given me a different answer. He could have said, you know, stick it out here a little bit longer. I probably wouldn’t have gone. So that advice, [00:08:00] I was like, okay, that he’s right. At least I’ll be on camera. And I moved back and then, you know, then ultimately you have to work years and years and years to, then it took me 10 years to get back to la. Mm. Rory: Yeah. That’s interesting. ’cause I think of like speaking. And it’s like even if you’re practicing to the mirror, it’s like it’s super valuable. You’re going through the awkward motion of being in front of an audience, even if it’s just you. Yes. And like those great point hours, those are reps. And you know, fast forward to the modern world, I think of the same thing. It’s like if you’re a content creator, it’s like, how much time are you in front of a microphone or in front of a camera? Because it’s like, if you’re not, how are people ever gonna find, like, how are you ever gonna get good? And then how are, how are you ever gonna produce enough content that people ever, ever find you? Lu: Yeah. You have to do the work, even if it’s ugly. Right. Even if it’s bad. Even if you feel like, oh, you’re just gonna crawl outta your skin. Right. I remember doing live shots, uh, outside of an, I mean, they were such [00:09:00] easy stories, like literally so easy. And I, my heart rate. Would just be like, they’d be like three, two, and they’d point at me, whatever. My heart rate just, it was. Um, and you know, I would flub it because I would memorize it. Another great point. I would memorize everything as opposed to knowing your message. Right. What’s the difference? So, um, I, I was the only one on this story. No one else knew the story, so I’m the messenger, right, to tell the audience. So I don’t need to memorize it. I just need to sort of have my format, like an outline, and then just tell the story. Like, Hey guys, I’ve been here, you know, the school board meeting started at five 30, they voted on A, B, C, and D, and here’s what they had to say, and then tossed to the story, right? I would have it like all set. So if I messed up one word. It would freak out liter. I wouldn’t freak out, but there was always a pause ’cause I wasn’t good enough to pick it back up. Both: Yeah. Lu: Um, but it’s a great point [00:10:00] now is that, don’t memorize what you’re going to say on social media. Right. Just have a feeling for, like, I, I saw the interview you did with Nicholas, uh, is it Nicholas? Nicholas John, yeah. Nicholas John Nicholas. The key. Yeah. How he sort of basic, he said, you know, he sits down and sometimes records them, but he likes to feel it in the moment. Right. It’s when you get that aha moment of like, oh, this, I need to share this, or I want to share this. Yes. Or How beautiful was that? Sit down at that moment and either write it out, but more importantly, if you are on camera, get on camera and do it. Right, because then that’s when the beautiful softness comes out. The, the emotion might come out because it’s, it’s your emotion. Right. As opposed back to don’t memorize it. Mm-hmm. Because people know when you’ve memorized something. When it doesn’t feel right. Rory: Yes. Now you. For the longest time TV was like the only live broadcasting, I mean radio too. Yeah. But, but now all of us have a button that we can [00:11:00] push to go live. You and I went live last week. Mm-hmm. Or a couple weeks ago. ’cause you were helping us support us for our book launch. Yeah. We did it Lu: on Instagram and Rory: we went live and so many people are terrified of going live, which I understand, right. As a speaker, which was like kind of my classic trait there is this like. You’re, you know, you can’t edit. Right. You’re doing it. So how do you overcome the fear of being live? Mm-hmm. Knowing that like, there’s no editing this moment. Mm-hmm. And what happens here? Lu: Well, I’m very comfortable live only because, like you mentioned in the intro, I’m live every day for four hours a day. Like, and granted it’s me. Reading a prompter, but sometimes when breaking news happens, it, the prompter goes out of the room, right? So everything’s live ear pieces, um, telephone calls, what we’re seeing on the screen. Uh, and it’s one of those things [00:12:00] when we have a choice to tape something in TV or make it live. Same thing with Instagram. You can tape it or ins or do it live. I always choose live really. I always choose live, and I always prefer my guests to be, I want to interview the guests live too, because what happens if you don’t? The guests will say, uh, they’ll start talking and then they get in their head and they forget. They’re thumbing. They’ll be like, oh, wait, can I start over? Mm. Right. Or, or they’re trying to edit it as they’re saying it to make it perfect, but when they know it’s live, you gotta pull. You’re gonna, it’s a, it is a muscle. So I think the more you go live, the better you get. Even if you’re not good. In the beginning, like I was horrible and that’s why I started in a small market. ’cause you can mess up and not get fired. Then you move to a medium market and you’re a little bit better, but you’re still gonna fumble because you’re gonna get a different type of story. Right? Or a lot, now you’re doing live interviews on camera, right in the field at a shooting or something with a police officer, and then it [00:13:00] becomes. Then you’re on set doing live. So my advice to people, even with Instagram, is do as much live as you can. Obviously when you’re by yourself, that’s, is that live taped, I guess that’s taped. But live is where you, but do to live Rory: by yourself on Instagram and just talk to it. Yes. And do that. Lu: And do it, because then you’ll notice, or at least I notice when I’m taping something for Instagram, I’m a little. Stiffer ’cause I’m in my head. Mm-hmm. But when I know someone’s over there, there’s a feeling, maybe it’s ’cause I’ve worked in TV so long, I just, I know I’m speaking to someone, so it’s like fluid. My blood pressure sort of goes down and I, I become a little bit more real. Rory: Mm-hmm. Now what? So on that, one of the things, I’ve been on national TV a couple times. Mm-hmm. And like I remember. That’s like, I was on Fox News Morning. Mm-hmm. And it was so fast. Yeah. It was like a four minute segment. Mm-hmm. And it literally felt like 10 [00:14:00] seconds. Yeah. I mean, I couldn’t believe how fast it went by. Yeah. How do you get to the point quickly? How do you tell a story? Like, you know, if you’re doing a story, like you’re saying, you might only have two minutes or something to tell the, tell the story. Do you have any tips for. Being very concise. ’cause I feel like, again, most of this, I, most people listening to this are probably never going to host a TV show. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But all of us are being pressed by the algorithm and the videos and the shortening attention spans. Yes. To like get to the point quickly. How do you do that particularly in a live moment? Lu: A lot of stuff is coming up in my head. Um, Oprah just said, I saw her talking the other day that she, every time back in the day for her show, and she still does it, is that she’ll say before she does any of that, she’ll say, what is my intention for this segment? What is my intention for this interview that I’m getting ready to go do on Fox? Right? [00:15:00] What is the intention? So set that right so you can always come back to that intention, almost like your book Come back to the purpose, right? Always come back to the purpose. And then with us with TV, and it’s bled now into Instagram, is that you wanna get them everyone’s attention within the first three to seven seconds, right? Mm-hmm. So I learned as a journalist when I was in the field writing stories, I always led with my juiciest soundbite. Either emotion, like sadness, someone crying, unfortunately, or someone laughing. Or the sound of like kids in a playground, whatever it was, because you want to grab them. You don’t wanna just start with, today we were on the playground and it was fun as opposed to like, kids like, yeah, yeah, yeah. So it’s more about like lead with the good stuff, right? Mm-hmm. Lead with your emotion, but then if you have sound or if you have a good quote or if you have, um, a philosophy, but like with you [00:16:00] too, going on. We onto Fox. You probably had set questions that they asked you not set, but you sort of, kind of knew what they were. Kept talking points. Yeah, just keep it concise. Like we also say, um, you know, keep it, keep it simple, stupid. Like that’s kind of a, it, it reminded me when I would have this great story and I’d be in the live truck riding and we needed to keep it at 1 15, 1 30 minutes, like a minute, 90 seconds. I could tell a story in 90 seconds. A whole story. But sometimes I’d want to tell it in 1 54, but I knew 1 54 was too long and it actually felt too long. Rory: That is crazy. Uh, well, and even like hooks, like today, everyone talks about hooks, but it was like, to me, the local news was the master of hooks long before, because the tease, uh, the tease, the tease, the Ts, the Ts, the T, it was just like. Uh, you know, new study comes out like, there’s something causing cancer all around town. It might be in your refrigerator. Find out what it is. I Both: [00:17:00] like, I got, I Rory: mean, that was, yeah. And, and now it’s like everybody’s learning, having to learn that skill. Did you write your own hooks or does somebody else kind of write? I Lu: have in the past. Okay. Now I don’t, I go in and edit sometimes over the years, like I’ve just noticed, I’ll, I’ll go in and edit like, um. Boring verbs. Like I want a, you want action verbs as opposed to was going, you know, you can be like, he jumped, he was going to jump, or what? Like you don’t want it to be like, um. Just kind of, you want action verbs no matter what it is and like a strong word, more of a strong word. But the teases are amazing. Like now when I help people edit, my friends will have me edit like a story or something. Not a news story, but just something you can just kind of find that as a journalist, writing over the years and having to write fast. It’s really interesting how you can go in and just take out that, like you don’t need the word that on really anywhere. If you notice the word that is like irrelevant. [00:18:00] Um, and then just tightening sentences. And for, in your case, or if anyone’s listening and they’re doing an interview, they’re being interviewed, which I’m not doing a very good job right now ’cause I’m rambling on and on. But if you’re on TV and you know, you have four minutes mm-hmm. And they’re anchors are getting ready to ask you all these questions, answer the question, know what you’re gonna answer, but, and then just stop. And then they’ll ask you another question. Don’t feel like you have to be in control of the interview. Both: Mm. Lu: Because then you’ll blow through all the questions we have people come on that’ll blow through all our questions in like their first statement, and then we’re like, uh oh. But we’re good enough. You know? ’cause we’ve been on, we’ll just kind of backtrack and ask some different questions. But let it Rory: toss back and forth. Yeah. And be punchy rather than long-winded. Lu: Yes. And, and you know, back to the pageant days when I think one of the reasons I won Miss USA to be honest, is that, um, to be honest, is another great, not a good thing to say. Like, I’m trying not to say that [00:19:00] either, because like, aren’t you honest all the time? It’s like, so now I’m just being honest, so I’m trying to take that out and I just said it. But, um, to be, to be truthful, um, when I was. Interview. We had one-on-ones with each judge for four minutes. Okay. And I treated them as a friend at a party. Okay. I did not treat them as celebrities or agents or just like in your mindset. I sat down and said, these are my friends. I’m meeting them at a cocktail party. Even though it was weird. ’cause some people were celebrities. Right. And I was young and, and, and I really think, and I always talk, ask them questions. Like about like, or if they, she had a hat on and then she started talking about her hat, or like, I always put it back on them. So it’s not always about you. Sure. Right. So that’s always another great thing where make it feel like it’s a conversation as opposed to answering the question. Like, answer the question stop. Answer the question. Stop. Just don’t ramble on. Rory: So I want to ask [00:20:00] you about. Live TV debacle. Mm-hmm. What’s the, what’s the, like, I know that you cover it up, right? Like when it’s live you have to recover. Are there any, or what’s, what is one that you can think of that was like, this is the most disastrous thing that ever happened to me on live tv, and I’m just curious, like, what was it or what, how did, how did you respond? Well, two Lu: things happened. One, the first time I was ever on. An anchor desk as a reporter. So the two anchors were up there and I was a reporter and I was doing a story, so I would’ve been, they would’ve said, and Lou Parker is here now with the story, Lou, and I’d be sitting, right. I was sitting right next to them. And so I’m supposed to say, hi, John and Tammy, and then I’m supposed to turn to the prompter, which is here, and everything’s supposed to be there. And you know, of course I’m nervous. I’m like brand new. And I turned to the prompter that I had written, and it was supposed to scroll and it was going like this. So I have Nothing was showing. No, all the [00:21:00] words were just, oh, like fast forward or something. We’re not sure what happened. I don’t know what happened. This is your Rory: first time ever. I Lu: think I blocked it out because I don’t remember first time ever being able to, I mean, that’s pretty scary. It was bad. But the other one that was really good is, so there’s a term in, um, TV called Stretch, and you probably know it too, like just stretch where we, the person’s not here yet. The interview’s, not, the phone’s not on. So just stretch. Or in breaking news we say stretch a lot. So just Rory: like draw it out. Like fill the, fill the time. Yeah. We, I need you to Lu: fill the time stretch. Okay. So I am new reporter. I’ve been given the opportunity to go to Disney on Ice and be the love Disney on Ice. I know, right? But it was Friday. Um, and every Friday at six o’clock we would have, which is kind of dangerous thinking back in the day. Like we just would have the reporter out there talking and people would call in. And ask questions, which is I, they would scan and make sure they weren’t, you know, like crazies. But it was, [00:22:00] we, I had answered two or three with someone. I was like, oh, this is working, this is asking a lot of a new reporter. Like, I didn’t know what I was doing. Right. And to be like clear, I had a friend, I was dating a guy in North Carolina who had a friend named Jason, but they called him Stretch, right? So. My producer’s in my ear and the other person’s talking to me like, yeah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. My producer says, um, stretch. I thought they were saying Your next caller is a name stretch. So when that person stopped, I said, our next caller is stretch. And my producer was like, no. Oh, right, no. Oh, yeah. Started yelling, right? Your ear yelling like, no, like, and the photographer fell like he fell ’cause he started laughing, but I didn’t understand because I didn’t know what stretch was. And she was like, just keep talking. So that I, I didn’t live that down. I mean, that was like for many, many years actually, people knew about it. When I [00:23:00] got to San Antonio, someone knew about it, which is embarrassing. It doesn’t sound as bad. But it was bad. Rory: I, I I The idea of listening to a person Yeah. Talking and hearing someone in your ear that freaks me out. Yeah. Like, I’m like, how do I, my, I don’t, my brain cannot give all of those. Lu: It’s a dance. Those dance, it’s a dance. The producer has to be good. It’s when, when you have a good producer, they know when that pause comes, they know when to say, Hey, we have sergeant, blah, blah, blah, on the line while my co-anchors talking. And then once I start talking, she’ll find, or he will find a space just to, they don’t ramble on in our ear. ’cause once they hit that it cuts all the audio. I only can hear them. Wow. It is a dance that, Rory: that, that’s tricky. Mm-hmm. Okay. So I want another shocking moment that people would not know about. Lu: Oh no. Rory: I know you’ve interviewed lots of celebrities. Yeah. What celebrity shocked you the most or surprised you the most? Or what sort of [00:24:00] celebrity interview did you do where you were like, that was not at all what I was expecting. Lu: Yeah. Rory: Uh, ’cause you’ve interviewed a bunch of ’em. Lu: Gosh. So Tom Cruise was very, very cool. I, I interviewed him on the cruise carpet. Tom Cruise is very cool. Yes. But I wasn’t expecting him to be very like. High like he was, but he, and he could have been like high and, but he was very present without being flirty. Right. So it wasn’t a flirty thing. It was very like present. And I, I remember thinking it was very, it was a lot of energy in a good way. Right. But he just has a lot of energy that I remember that. But he was Rory: like engaged with you? Very engaged. Not like, I’m too good for you. No, very engaged and not like, I’m trying to like, come on to you answer Lu: the questions. It was like perfection, like he was. He was really cool. Interesting. Yeah. And then, um, Aretha Franklin, I got to interview before her concert at, um, SoFi Stadium, or one of the large staples maybe before it got [00:25:00] switched over. And I knew I was gonna interview her, but I wasn’t sure like what that would look like. And I, and then I was like, oh my God, I’m interviewing Aretha Franklin. Like, really? This is gonna, and I was expecting her to come in like big, like. I want this, I need that. I need blah, blah, blah. And when I tell you like I felt like she was a sister when she walked in the room, it was so the beautiful. Just conversation we had and just being able to sit there with her and then all of the old school managers from back in the day, all the big names that, you know, like came in with her too. She had no ego and those are the cool things when you meet somebody that big, that could have come in huge in ego and she wasn’t. It was, it was really special. Rory: I love that. Yeah. Lu: It’s really nice. Rory: I wanna talk about FAME for a second. Mm-hmm. What have you learned about fame? Um, you, you know, you have a level of fame. I mean, you’re starting off with being Miss USA, but then also, I mean, around [00:26:00] la like everybody knows you. I mean, they see you every day for hours. Um, also you’ve interviewed a lot of famous people, been around a lot of famous people, and I think there are some people, uh, maybe a lot of people who would listen to this or watch this, that might think, Hey, I really, they want to be famous. Hmm. Is there anything that you would say to somebody who wants to be famous about what they should know about it? Kind of going into that journey or pursuit? Lu: Yeah. Well, I’ll definitely say that being famous is your career, right? Whatever you’re gonna be famous at as a, as a actress or a actor or a TV person, or whatever it is that you are aspiring to be. Ultimately that’s never, you can, you’re gonna get there, but that is not what’s going to love you and fulfill you. Mm-hmm. It’s really kind of crazy. I just heard a professional golfer talking about this [00:27:00] yesterday, and I think it was shuffler. Mm-hmm. I could, at a press conference, he was talking about this and he, and, and, and I was like, yes sir. I to, I wouldn’t have understood that 10, 15 years ago, but I get it now like. We pursue and pursue and pursue and pursue and pursue. And we’re on a treadmill. And we’re on a treadmill trying to, you know, satisfy something or someone ourselves, or someone in the past, or our parents or whatever it is, but ultimately that win, whatever that is, does not love you. And so the advice is yes, if you wanna be famous, if you want to be, you know, known or. When golf tournaments or BN TV news or have 1.1 million followers, again, those 1.1 million followers love you, but they’re not gonna be there at four o’clock in the morning for you if you need something, right? Mm-hmm. Um, just to remember, to love and support the people around you. Right? And re never forget who you [00:28:00] are. Right? Don’t sell your soul to be that. Because if you sell your soul to be that, then it’s gonna be empty at the top. Rory: Mm-hmm. I think that’s that. I, you know, Jim Carrey has a quote, something to the effect of like, I wish everyone could be rich and famous Yes. To, because then they would just know that it’s not what’s gonna, you know, bring their heart fulfillment. Lu: Right. Because the heart fulfillment. The heart fulfillment is. The hard fulfillment is you doing the work and getting quiet. The older I get, the more it’s like getting quiet and, and finding that, finding the purpose. Finding a spiritual practice, finding whatever that spiritual practice looks like. Breath work, church, friends, um, getting quiet, loving you, right? Like always coming back to you, which we’re not taught to come back to ourselves. We’re always taught to be. The external world will make us happy. But really it’s like that whole thing where like I got, I’m gonna go to [00:29:00] India to go search myself, but you’re still with you. You’re still with you. So you can find yourself in a closet in your house. You know, if you get quiet enough and do enough work, you can really find yourself. And then when you get to the top or the middle, or whatever your goals are in a relationship or wherever, you’re more grounded, right? ’cause you love you and you are worthy. Rory: Yes. So you and I talked a little bit about this. You, you shared an irony about yourself with me before we started, that you’ve used your voice, your entire career mm-hmm. To report the news, tell other people’s stories, conduct interviews, but that there’s an irony that sometimes you struggle to find your own voice in what, what does that mean exactly. And. Talk talk. Um, tell me a little bit about that. Like, uh, what’s that been like to, to, I guess, have some of that [00:30:00] realization and how, how do you find your own voice after making a career of like telling other people’s stories? Lu: It’s been a really long journey. Um, and I didn’t even know, I didn’t have my voice until it just hit me that I did, I had not been using my voice, and I think it’s. The more research I do on it, younger girls have their voice until around puberty and then then to their twenties and like late twenties. And typically that’s when we start to lose our voice because we either are told, you know, in relationships or jobs or in society or wherever it is that speaking up and taking space can be aggre looked at as aggressive. Um, it can be like taking up too much room or even, even I think the worst is like that. It’s not feminine to speak up. You know, I was taught that like, not necessarily just by my parents. My parents were super supportive, um, all through my life, [00:31:00] but I think society and growing up in the south too, like, be a good girl. Be a sweet girl. Don’t, don’t cause any ruffles, you know, so I, I grew up as a people pleaser, you know, and I don’t wanna look like that person that’s speaking up and using her voice. So granted I was. Um, successful and going up a path. I just wasn’t using my voice right. Then I started using my voice, um, with animal advocacy and I think that’s where I started really getting out there and talking and like really helping the community. And then I was using my voice, obviously through journalism, but it’s different ’cause you can hide, right? ’cause journalism is so I’m telling someone else’s story. I’m not like speaking up Sure. Or animals or speaking up for the community or um, or speaking up for yourself. Um, and then, Rory: um, did you run into that a lot in terms of like, just being a female in TV and entertainment? I mean, it’s, there’s this irony of like, Hey, we want you to play this role, but also like, not have [00:32:00] too much power, not take up too much space. I mean, did you, did you, have you bumped into that in terms of just. Being a woman in a professional, you know, like a very competitive environment. It is a Lu: competitive environment and it’s a dog eat dog environment. Uh, uh, as long, I mean all a lot of professions are, but tv very much so. ’cause you’re having to climb the ladder and push and pull and, um, you just, I always tell, I used to always tell the girls, like the younger girls, they would be like, well, they’d be concerned about someone coming in and their job getting taken. And I was like, you cannot look over your shoulder. You have to like. Always look forward as the female or male, but I again, always go back to the female. But you have to look forward and look at your accomplishments. I did that during the pageant too. ’cause all the girls that were around me were beautiful, successful in shape. If I started focusing on them, then you lose your power, right? So I would tell the girls like, don’t look over your shoulder. But at the same time, all that stuff creeps up for us [00:33:00] too. Because over the years we’ve been told, like once you. Get older, you’re not gonna be on camera as long as the men or whatever. Now that’s changing for sure. Um, I’m one of the oldest, um, at the station, uh, at KTLA. I’ve been there 20 years, which is crazy. I’ve done like every, um, schedule every segment, but I think it’s more of just knowing that if you know something is not right. At your work, in relationship in society, at the animal shelters across the world, wherever it is, and it is tugging at your heart. Like you, you are allowed to go out and talk about it. Mm. And speak the truth. You’re allowed to and you’re not. You’re not gonna make everybody happy. And I’m now, as we know on social media, people are gonna beat you up about it. Or they’re gonna be like, oh, she thinks blah, blah, blah. Or she did that. Well, how can she say that? Um. You if you know it’s the truth. If you’re speaking your [00:34:00] truth and you really believe something, you have not only the right to speak up, you have a little bit of a responsibility to speak up for yourself, but also for the girls that are coming up from behind us. ’cause like even like all the women who pave the road for me at in tb, like Barbara Walters, like can you imagine what she went through as a female anchor like it was. Intense, but she just stayed in there and she paved the way. She said, no, I’m speaking up for myself. I deserve also to be at this desk. I wouldn’t be at the desk if it weren’t for her. Rory: Mm-hmm. You know, I wanna talk, I want you to talk to younger women right now for a second, because you have, among, among all the things that you’ve done, you’ve also been highly critiqued. I mean, from being in a beauty pageant to. Being on TV and you have your producers, but then you have like all of these people watching you, uh, you know, even on your Instagram, right. I’ll see people saying [00:35:00] things that have nothing to do with like your character or something. They’re just like commenting on, on your appearance or if, and I think that is something that, you know, if you put yourself out there, you’re going to, that’s going to happen. Yeah. There’s no way that you put yourself out there. And particularly, I wanna hear from you about. You know, if there’s a younger woman who’s listening to this or watching, what would you whisper in her ear right now about when she is critiqued? When she critiques herself, when, you know, whatever, whatever is, because that’s going to come if she’s in front of people. Mm-hmm. And, and if she is using her voice. What did what you want her to know? Lu: Well, I, and I will speak to them, but I think it’s every woman no matter what age you are. Mm-hmm. Because I think once you know, a woman can be 72 and still be reluctant to use her voice or feel like, oh, I shouldn’t wear that dress. Or, [00:36:00] you know, I want to wear those cowboy boots, but maybe I shouldn’t ’cause I’m 72. You can wear those cowboy boots if you want to wear those, those sparkly pink cowboy boots. Um, I think the first word that came in my mind when you were talking is that nothing is perfect. No one is perfect. There’s no definition of perfection, right? So once we let go of that, ’cause all women, and some men too obviously are, we’re all searching to be perfect, perfect body. The perfect attitude, the perfect house, the perfect life, the perfect everything right? And. Yeah, there’s nothing is perfect if you try to define it. It’s really you. Everyone’s got a different de definition of that, right? Mm-hmm. So for myself, working through the pageant world, I was kind of young and just was like working out and doing my thing and just kind of went through it. Plus you’re not really concerned that much then ’cause you’re like young and you just kind of make it happen. Um, meaning. [00:37:00] That you can work out and perfect things and not judge yourself as much, I think. Um, but now as you get older and those times progress, I think the judgment comes from society and that with this Instagrams, everyone, Instagram and all the Facebooks and the tiktoks, everyone looks so perfect and so beautiful and we’re not, and if we can just sit to that woman younger or older, if. Looking in the mirror like you were doing the speech in the mirror. I sometimes, and you’ve probably heard this before, I sometimes like say hi to myself in the mirror now. Like, as opposed to waking up and saying, dang, what happened? Like, you look tired, your hair looks like hell. You know, did you gain weight last night? Or, I mean, ’cause we say stuff like that, right? Like, and I’m, you know, I shouldn’t have done that. Now I need to, you know, I’m gonna look horrible on camera today. Right? There’s a lot of that pressure. Um, as opposed to saying good morning, like, how’d you sleep last [00:38:00] night? Um, I love you. Like, really? Look, it’s so creepy and beautiful at the same time. To literally look at yourself in the mirror, eye to eye and look at yourself and say, I love you. Like it’s heavy. And then you’re, then you realize, oh yeah, I’m a person too. Right. I’m not just an object that I’m having to like look good for, to get a guy or look good to keep my job or look good in on my Instagram post. I think you and I talked about it when I, when you, when I interviewed you, is that I was, I find sometimes when I’m posting and I don’t look up to my par what I think I should look like. Both: Mm-hmm. Lu: Um, I won’t post it. I’ve, I’ve, I’ve written, I’ve. Said things before and like recorded things and won’t post it. ’cause I’m like, and then I’m, and I’m getting better at it now. I’m like, you know what? I don’t care. Like if someone judges me because like a piece of [00:39:00] hair was out or, you know what, whatever I’m judging myself for, um, who cares anymore. Like, I’ve gotten to a point where I’m, I mean, I do care. Obviously I care, like, um, but I’m not so hard on myself anymore. So I think that’s another great nugget of advice to the girls too, is like, it’s okay to, like, don’t be so hard on yourself. Like it really is okay, no one’s perfect. We’re all making our way through this. No one’s actually looking at you. They’re, they’re worried about themselves. They’re, they’re really not. They, they might look at you for a second, but it’s really, they’re gonna go back to themselves of what, what, what their issues are. You know? Rory: Yeah. I love what you said about the mirror too. Like I’ve noticed even with myself, it’s like if I just sort of look vaguely at the mirror mm-hmm. You know, I see my body. Yeah. But when I get close and I look at my eyes, like everything fades away. And it’s almost like I see my real self, your Lu: soul. You see your soul. That’s why they say the eyes are the window to the [00:40:00] soul. Mm-hmm. And even like with interviewing too, like if I like look, literally look at you. Mm-hmm. And like, look at your eyes right now, it’s a more intense. Because we’re looking at each other. ’cause a lot of times people interview or talk or just in general, we can be at a cocktail party, but we talk like this. Right. ’cause it is scary to go there. Right, right. I, I did this really cool retreat one time, um, where, uh, up in Bicker and they had us sit with one of the people that were in our group or whatever. We had been there for two days. So I felt like I sort of knew the people, but I didn’t. It’d be, and we, we sat and we had to stare at each other for four minutes and not divert our eyes. And it is fascinating what happens. Even if you do it with someone you know, it’s still gonna be fascinating and awkward. Yeah. But you don’t divert and people laugh, then the tears come or they get really quiet and then, [00:41:00] or it’s more laughter. Because they’re uncomfortable. Both: Mm-hmm. Lu: And then it’s just quiet and then there are a lot of tears. Mm-hmm. Right. But when you’re done, you feel like you’ve actually seen someone in that more important, they’ve seen you. Mm. Right. So you’ve shared this really beautiful existence with each other. We don’t do that enough in society, I don’t think. Rory: That’s amazing how much you can sense about how a person’s really feeling when you look them right in the eyes. And, and if they won’t look you in the eyes mm-hmm. That’s always like, wow, there’s something going on. Mm-hmm. Like there’s some really, they’re, they, they’re not steady enough to even look at another person. Yeah. Um, and that’s why I think, you know, I don’t remember where I heard this, but somebody was, was I heard this story about, or was somebody who was homeless and they said what they miss most is having people look at them. Right. See them. It’s like they just, they like, you see ’em and you look [00:42:00] past them. Yes. And they’re just like, I don’t, nobody looks at me. Yeah. Um, Lu: and you know, to that point, I, one of the things I try to do, I don’t always give money to the person or, and if I have food or something in the car, like I’ve done things like that before, but I think even just. When they’re walking by your car or they’re standing there instead of ignoring them. Like most people, like, I’ll either wave at them or look, look at them and smile, and they light up and smile right back. They don’t have, they don’t, it’s not gonna, they don’t, I would say 99% of it happened. Oh, that’s an open invitation to come to my window that I’m gonna, you know, like give you something. It’s just an acknowledgement. Of them. You know, it really, it is. That’s so powerful. But I think we all need that. Rory: Yeah. So, and, and I wanna, I wanna also ask you like on the, on this topic of kind of like you brought up, you interviewing a few times. I think another skill that, [00:43:00] another skill that’s very much transferring from TV to like everybody is the skill of interviewing. Mm-hmm. Because we are going live together on social, we’re doing, we’re doing podcasts, you know, we also have to interview our customers for. You know, testimonials and like sharing, sharing their stories. The, is there anything that you’ve learned, like something you used to do wrong as an inter interviewer or something that you used to do that now, after a couple decades of interviewing both celebrities and non-celebrities telling everyday ordinary stories and also these extravagant, like world changing moments that you’ve covered. Is there anything that you’ve changed in how you conduct an interview now versus when you first got into journalism? Lu: A couple things. Um, one, listen, because you can have your questions and then the answer from the person you’re interviewing kind of goes somewhere else and then all of a sudden [00:44:00] you do number two question. It’s like, ah. You have to kind of go where you’re good at it. You’ve done it in this interview where I went somewhere a little bit off of what you asked me. And then instead of going back to, you know, number eight that you were planning to ask me today, you picked up on that. It’s mirroring, right? It’s mirroring like what, what’s happening in the moment. Right? And I also believe in doing your research, you did that well too. Like you just. Set it off the cuff to the camera, like who I am and the bio, and doing your research, and always going a little deeper than the, than most people would do in terms when, when I’m. Say that as like find a little bit more, not just the normal of like who Roy is. Like try to find a little something else that he’s interested in or a fact like maybe where he went to school or like that wouldn’t have come up or like one of your favorite hobbies or whatever it is. Just go a [00:45:00] little deeper because people ultimately want to talk about themselves, right? And so when you, they realize that you’ve done the work to like show up. Read the book. If you’re gonna interview someone, read the book or listen to it. It’s re I mean, if you’re being interviewed, Rory: you can’t read the whole book. You read the whole book. That’s what I’m saying. When you interview somebody do Lu: Well. I do know. No, not always. Always. Like youll scan but you at least scan it. One. But sometimes, you know, in the past I’ve done interviews with people and I haven’t read the book ’cause we get it at the last minute. Sure. Or whatever. What, or I chose not to, I don’t know, it just doesn’t feel the same. I love to go through it and know like at least what their concept are, the like top four concepts and also just the vibe of it. But you can also listen to audio and hear their voice, like just spend like an additional 20 minutes just getting a little vibe of who they are. Mm-hmm. Um. We are so fast. Like we have three se three [00:46:00] to four segments typically in a day. So like almost every show has a segment and it’s either like cooking or, um, products or a, the doctor will see you now, so a doctor comes on or wish a wish kid, um, segment where a family comes on, or we’ll have a barbecue segment or like, so it’s like stimuli constantly, right? So, um. Back to your point of just get on camera, get on the microphone. Because the more you do it, the more, or get on stage or talk in the mirror because it’s like reps, like you pennies in a jar. ’cause then you get better at, like, if you’re on stage and you forget your train of thought, you’ve got that rep to pull like, oh, well I can just kind of transfer right here and then figure out what the heck I was talking about before and then get back there. I’m sure that’s happened with you before. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Rory: Yes, for sure. I, I, I, this, this is. So fun and exciting and useful and I think relevant to just go, I think there’s so many skills, technical [00:47:00] skills today that are come, like out of the TV world that now apply to, to all of us, um, and the most of all, which is just the confidence and the like, you know, self-worth. Is there anything that I should have asked you that, is there anything I should have asked you that I didn’t ask you? That you think is something that you go, I really want people to know this, or, you know, here’s, here’s something that, you know, I’ve experienced that I think could be useful to a mission-driven messenger who’s listening or watching. Lu: I would say, and I’m only speaking just from my struggles and my fear of taking that first step in the transition, like I can walk into a TV studio. Or sit on a studio and interview people or go out in the field. I can do it in two seconds and have be amazing confidence. Right? And, and I’m trying to transfer some of my [00:48:00] skills now into maybe some writing and, and more speaking on stage and, and I’m ready. I know I’m ready. Just like a lot of people are probably ready to do the next step and they, but they’re talking about it a lot. But they’re not doing it. I’m finding myself like, this is what I want to do, but I won’t like actually do it. Right. So I think the confidence comes from I had to go do it. I had to go do the report. I didn’t want to do, I had to go cover the shooting. I didn’t want to have to go see a body. I, I, you know, I had to show up at two o’clock in the morning and do a morning show for two years. Like, I sometimes I was tired, but like, I. I put my right foot in front of my left foot, and I, I started right again, back to perfection. Nothing’s perfect, and I’m talking to myself as well. When I’m saying this to everyone who’s listening, just take the step and the universe will trust you. The, the universe, Jesus, I know in your world, [00:49:00] like whatever the plan is, if you believe in yourself, even if you’re shaky, just take that first step. And when you take that first step, the universe goes, oh, they’re ready to move. And whatever that movement looks like is what it’s supposed to look like and it’ll happen. Rory: Mm-hmm. Well, Lou, you have been such a symbol of kindness and confidence to so many people and in my life. Thanks. Uh, and I, it, I, I’ve been honored to get to know you. Thank you for sharing some of these insights and, you know, some of these more candid moments from like behind the, behind the scenes that people may not. Now, where do you want people to go if they want to stay connected with you and kind of follow you in your journey? Lu: I’m on Instagram, uh, primarily I’m getting on Substack. Oh, soon. So I’m super excited about that, if you’re familiar with Substack and, uh, I’m Blue Parker LA on Instagram. And um, yeah, I’m just, I think that’s the best place for now is just, um, that’s where I’ll probably be making [00:50:00] any announcements or sharing my. Um, stories or whatever I’m doing. Yeah. Well, thank you for the Rory: kindness. Thanks for the insight. Thank you. And my friend. Lu: Thank you for what you’re doing and congratulations on your book. Thank you. Yeah, thank you so much. You’re helping me take the first step. Rory: I love it. Lu: Yeah, Rory: I love it. Thanks. Well, we wish you all the best and we look forward to following you from here. Lu: Thanks.