AJV (00:01): Hey everybody. Welcome to the influential Personal Brand podcast, AJ Vaden here. And I am, uh, going to be having an amazing conversation with a new friend of mine, Jason Stacy. And, um, before I formally introduce him, as I always do, I wanna kind of let you guys know what this episode is all about and why you should stick around. Sometimes I have hyper-specific episodes that are really for those of you who are trying to write a book or launch a book, others who are building their speaking career, or, you know, you’re trying to build a coaching community. This is not one of those episodes. This is one of those episodes that is about how to succeed at life . So it doesn’t matter what you do, where you are, who you are, this is one of those universal conversations that is going to help you no matter what stage of business or life that you’re in. AJV (00:56): So I wanted to let you guys know upfront that, uh, occasionally we have these universal kind of conversations. It just applies to everything. Um, but I think this is a really great and important topic about managing your energy, emotions, and environment, and how being the master of those things helps you succeed at life. So that is why you need to stick around. Now, before we get into this amazing conversation about all these things, uh, let me introduce you to Jason. Stacy. We are gonna talk about his journey from homelessness to high performance coaching. Uh, and I think all I really, really, it’s gonna be, it’s God conversation about his testaments, uh, to resilience, adaptability, and unshakeable foundations, and how we can all build those from learning about these things. Now, over the last 20 years, he has worked with elite athletes, business leaders, and high stakes professionals, helping them not just reach the top, but more importantly, sustain their success once they get there. And his philosophy centers on mastering energy, emotions, and environment, because true success isn’t just about achieving greatness, it’s about sustaining an growing it wrong term. Jason, welcome to the show. Jason Stacy (02:11): Well, good morning everybody. . Well, thanks for a huge introduction. That’s great, . AJV (02:16): Well, you know, I think it’s one of these, and why I thought you were gonna be so great for this show, um, is I think a lot of people talk about how to get success. How do we reach the top? How do we do all these things? But very few people actually talk about what do you do when you get there and how do you keep it, and how do, how do you sustain it? It’s one thing to do all the work to achieve these things, but is it really what it’s all cracked up to be when you get there? And what do you, what do you do to maintain and sustain when you get there? Um, so I thought this was gonna be an, an amazing just topic for our particular audience. Uh, but before we get into that, uh, I have a burning question, , that I really wanna know, because I think it’s always a fascinating place to start is to learn a little bit about your story and your history. But I really wanna know, how did you go from, you know, being homeless to high performance coaching, and how has that journey really informed your approach to coaching? Jason Stacy (03:17): Wow. So to start off with a small question, I see so easy. There we go. We have a whole episode for this one right now. Um, well look, I mean, it’s, it’s a very long journey. It wasn’t something just like, you know, it some small or some sudden, you know, aha moment that happened. It was, uh, I mean, how I got became homeless. I mean, the, the short version is my father died when I was very young. I was around 10 years old. You know, it really hurt my mom quite a bit. Um, gosh, I always get a little bit emotional. I talk about it. But, um, uh, after a couple years of, you know, being pretty rough with her, I just, I was, I, I don’t know how I ended up at some people’s houses doing some weird babysitting thing. And I went back, um, after that and nobody was there, . So, yeah. AJV (04:00): Oh, wow. Jason Stacy (04:02): So weird. still get emotional about it. So anyway, so I had a few years where I was just by myself on the street just trying to figure out how to, to live, survive. And I was, you know, AJV (04:11): So what, you went home from a babysitting gig Jason Stacy (04:13): And how Yeah, that’s where I was staying. I was for a few weeks. I was like there for a while, like for a few weeks, like with these people. And these people were messed up too, as it was a, it was a terrible environment. It was, it was. Yeah. I can’t even believe some of the things, if I would ex explain to you or tell you some stories, like you wouldn’t believe it. It was just blowing my mind. But anyway, so yeah, I like, look, I ended up being, you know, homeless and I was by myself for a few years there for most of that part, finding ways to survive, to just all kinds of different things. And, you know, I was, I did try to go back to school. I officially, I finished eighth grade was the last grade that I finished, you know, like, you know, as far as school, school goes. Jason Stacy (04:45): But wow, I was trying to go back to school. I was having people, I was like doing things for, to help pretend like my parents to sign things and just doing stuff like this. But anyway, how I ended up getting back off the streets was in this neighborhood, which was a pretty crappy neighborhood really. It was, um, a, uh, martial arts school, like a, it was in between like an adult bookstore and like a old tavern, you know, it was like a, in a pawn shop. It was just a, it was a crappy little place, right. Um, you know, the area itself. And I used to walk by this martial arts because I was, I was born in Japan actually, and I, as a young child, I started martial arts from when I was a little kid. And I was just always a big part of my, like, identity in my life, you know, before all this, you know, sort of mess happened. And, um, I, uh, I mean, I would go in there sometimes and just watch and sit and watch and, you know, eventually the owners, but there was like a lot of like police officers and military guys kind of training there. And, um, they, uh, uh, eventually let me train there, even though I had no parent to like sign things, this and that. And Jason Stacy (05:41): I would say that’s probably, uh, geez, so weird. Anyway, that place is where like, it like got me off the streets. AJV (05:51): Wow. Jason Stacy (05:52): So I haven’t talked about that much in a while. So, AJV (05:56): You know, um, my, my good friend Ben Klarik always says that tears are truth tellers. Jason Stacy (06:02): , right. There you go. There’s a bit of truth there. Anyway, a lot of people in my life now who I consider family I’ve met there mm-hmm . So they, you know, a lot of training, you know, even, excuse me, eventually started teaching there. And through there I actually learn a lot about coaching, a lot about people. Because in the martial arts, it’s a very holistic approach to things. You know, you, you’re developing the person not just learning how to fight, at least where I was training, you know, for all of our black belt levels too. I had stacks of books I had to read about philosophy, about history, about physiology, about human behavior, psychology. And I had to write papers on each of these books. So it was very about developing you as a human, as a person, not just, Hey, can you defend yourself or fight? Jason Stacy (06:39): It was a big part of that, obviously, you know. And then obviously the actual training, you’ll learn how to manage your emotions, about managing your mind, about being more aware of yourself, about your surroundings. And it was very, for me, just, I just got obsessed with that. And I got really like, hyper, you know, focused on being curious, asking lots of questions, wanting to understand how and why people work and the way they work. And I, I learned a lot about coaching, a lot about humans, a lot about people. You know, I was pretty young at that time. I was probably 19 or 20 years old, and I was like teaching guys twice my age, you know, about, about certain things. And, you know, I just, uh, the, my coaches and senses, they, you know, probably from my other experiences, you know, I had like a good sort of sense of, of these things. Jason Stacy (07:17): They just sort of naturally kind of went with that. And now, you know, from there I had some, we had some students who were like physiotherapists and massage therapist, and I would talk to them at night. I had a roommate. She was, you know, her and I, uh, got a place together as a roommate and she was a therapist, you a massage therapist and physio. And I’m talking about all these things about how the body works. And that’s, and she’s like, how do you know all this stuff? She’s like, you know, more than like, my teachers do, but you just don’t know the words of it. Like, you don’t know how to describe it. So it kind of like got me interested, like, Hey, you know, maybe I’ll go learn how to do this as a, as a career or a job. ’cause you know, I was still kind of floating around. Jason Stacy (07:49): So I put myself through like massage school and then sports therapies. And then I became a personal trainer, then a strength coach, and then athletic trainer, you know, the guys that kind of run on the field and do all that, you know, emergency care stuff in sport. And I did sort of just built up my own education from there, you know, and the one thing I, I noticed though, as I was doing that, a lot of the physical stuff just came natural for me. Like my kinesiology, all this stuff, I graduated honors, all this, I, it was, it just sort of came natural maybe from all the martial art training and understand human body and all that and the mechanics. Um, but one thing I noticed when I started working more, whether it was in gyms or clinics or, or on the field, is that there was a lot of very knowledgeable people, right. Jason Stacy (08:27): A lot around me. Most of ’em had much more experience. They had all their degrees and I had none of these things, you know, I just worked my way through it, sort of very non-traditional ways of getting educated. A lot of it was self-educated, which is I guess a bigger thing now, but back then not as much. So I had to really dig deep and figure out, find a way to learn these things and be in the right environment around the right people to, you know, be able to have access to this information. But one of the things that I did notice that people just didn’t quite get was the people part. Hmm. The building trust, the communicating, the connecting with people to get them to, you know, one of the biggest things that I really push and talk about with my coaches and other trainers and whatnot is, is, and even my clients, it, it’s, it’s that difference between people doing things because they have to versus because they want to. Jason Stacy (09:12): Hmm. So like a commitment over compliance type of thing, right? Mm-hmm . And so everyone was doing things because they had to, or because the doctor or the physio or the coach or whoever was telling them to do that, right? And so, you know, we had the typical thing right, where everyone kind of starts and stops and starts and stops. And so nothing was really happening, but I was getting, you know, I’m the new guy, everyone’s twice age with all these PhDs, and I’m like, I barely finished school. And I kind of went through this like, self-learning process and through just doing hard work, I got opportunities to be in the right places. And yet all the athletes and all the different coaches even and even physios were coming to me wanting to work with me, wanting to ask me questions, which I thought was really weird. Jason Stacy (09:47): But a lot of it was just like, I was just curious. I asked lots of questions, not in a disrespectful way, but to understand like, Hey, why are we doing this or that and this way, or what, why don’t we try this instead of that? And really just understanding these things. But the biggest part was, you know, everyone I worked with knew that I’d always give a hundred percent no matter what I was doing, where I was at, I was always a hundred percent engaged. And I never pretended I knew something I didn’t know. I didn’t have to be the one with all. So lemme AJV (10:13): Ask, I ask you a question about that really quickly because this whole concept of are you doing it because you have to versus you want to, I love that you said that, you know, is this a compliance thing or is this a commitment thing? Uh, I think it’s really important to something you just said is, you know, no matter what I did, I always gave it a hundred percent, right? Yes. Um, and I don’t think a lot of people do that. Jason Stacy (10:37): I agree. AJV (10:39): I tell you this, hear your take on, I’d love to just hear you. ’cause I think a lot of people are listening of going like, am I really good giving what I, whatever I’m doing 110% and is my team, or, you know, are people like missing their potential? And how do we get ourselves to give that level of commitment? How do we get our teams to do that? Jason Stacy (10:58): Yes. Well, I, I mean, I can answer, there’s a lot of, uh, answers to that question. I mean, one of the first things I would say is, you know what, if you’re asking that question more times than not, not always, but most of the time you already know the answer. You know what I mean? Like, if you’re asking, I go, am I really doing the what I could do? I mean, again, this is the same thing I see over and over again as everyone likes to lie to themselves. Mm. Kind of pretend, you know, we don’t have to just have that look in the mirror and go, Hey, you know, and, and I would say, um, how, how we go about doing that. Obviously, my, my first step is always looking at yourself. You know, yes, you’re right, your team, all these different things. But, you know, one of the biggest things about are you really, you know, doing it because you have to or because you want to. Jason Stacy (11:35): I mean, there’s so many variables there. There’s something you said that made me think of something. I, I forgot what you were saying, but, um, you know, for me, the biggest starting point is looking at yourself. You know, if you’re asking yourself that question, obviously, you know, there’s something missing, right? Mm-hmm . So just try to clear all that clear outta your head, try to clear the facade of what you think you’re doing, you know, and, and I think it goes to, it kinda leads to this, this other thing I like to talk about where, you know, to really start to improve and to go another level and to get that next stage, there’s, I think there’s like phases you go through, right? You know, it’s like these journeys. And a lot of it is, is, you know, it, it requires a level of vulnerability, like opening yourself up to, you know, whether it’s being coachable, being honest with yourself, you know, being, you know, a little bit, maybe, maybe not harder on yourself, but maybe having a, a balance of being really hard on yourself, but also being, having some self-compassion mm-hmm . Jason Stacy (12:22): Because sometimes we kinda like bring ourselves down and we end up not getting anything. We kinda get stuck. So I think there’s this, this, this process of you kinda need to have some vulnerability to be open for these things. Have that balance of being so, you know, being honest with yourself and being direct with yourself while still having some sort of self-compassion, knowing that you are, you know, doing what you need to do. And then that kinda leads into being a bit more mature, a bit of maturity of understanding. Maybe that comes with the experience of doing that, because it does take, it does take work to get there, you know what I mean? And, and I mean, I suppose there’s a lot of different layers here. You know, it’s kind of a big thing to . I’m not sure where to start, you know, on this commitment over compliance part. Jason Stacy (12:56): But I, I, I think the biggest part for me, I always to try to help coaches understand and, and, you know, people I work with, understand is it’s, it, it’s really about you. I can’t tell you, you know, this is how it is or not how it is. You have to know, you have to find a way to stop lying to yourself and stop sort of like pretending to hide behind some facade of like, oh, you have a system that you follow, or here’s my 10 steps to this, or here’s, you know, we all get busy doing that. We all like, you know, we’re like trying to sell ourselves constantly, you know? So I think we have to always kinda have one foot in, one foot out, you know? And then that kinda also leads to the people around you, you know, are they feeding you? Are they a little yes. Men kind of thing? Are they feeding you, you know, bs are they being honest with you? Are they, you know, are they doing the best that they can? There’s a lot of layers here. So I’m not sure what part that you wanted me to break down, but, you know, . Yeah. I AJV (13:42): Think, I think the biggest part that I think a lot of people really struggle with, and I am, you know, thinking a lot about, you know, the old saying is like, they’re just not quite reaching their potential. Sure. And I guess my, my real question is, you know, and we forget the teams for a second, and if we looked at, you know, all of us in the mirror and says like, yeah, I know I’m not giving it a hundred percent. I know I’m not doing my best. Why, from your experience, why do you think that is? And what, what would be some like tactical, tangible steps of going, Hey, this, this is what I have to do to be better. Right? And I think, I think there’s a lot of that just out there. And I don’t think this is new, right? I think everyone wants the easy road to success, right? It’s like, we all want it right now. We don’t wanna do the hard work to be fit, to be, you know, have healthy financials or healthy relationships or to be successful. It’s like, like, what’s the quickest way I can get there? And true success doesn’t happen like that. Yeah. But that’s, that’s the truth. No one really likes to talk about , but I think it’s the truth that we all really need to hear is like, no, that I, it actually requires work. Jason Stacy (14:51): Sure. Look, I I would say, you know, when you first started speaking, uh, somebody go back earlier, I think one of the biggest problems we have is there’s too many distractions as well. So it’s very easy to kind of think, you’re know, being busy doing all this and that, being very distracted. So you have to learn how to focus. So I would go to take a little step back. The, the how do you, how do you do what you need to do and be committed to it is that you have to learn now. And I, I don’t remember why I learned this, but I know it’s from someone else. I’m stealing this for sure. I just can’t remember where it was a long time ago, but I’ve been using it for decades now, is that, you know, the definition of focus, right? Focus is making the most important thing, the most important thing. Jason Stacy (15:26): Mm. And what is the most important thing is whatever I’m doing right now, like, you and I are having this conversation, and I just look at it as like, you and I, you and aj, Jason and AJ we’re just chatting, catching up, getting to know each other a little bit better. You know, I’m not worried or thinking about what I have to do after this. What just happened before I got on the call? What, you know, what my kids are doing, what arenas doing what this, none of that matters. Like right now I’m here like nothing else matters, period. And I’ve trained and conditioned myself to make sure that like, this is where I am, and if I ever catch myself slipping, I pull myself right back in, straight away. Right? So I think that’s a big part of being able to like, develop that skill. Jason Stacy (15:59): Now, what keeps people from d doing this? I think, you know, like you said, looking in the mirror and saying these things and you, you know, that you’re not really what’s, what’s stopping people? Mm-hmm . I mean, again, I think you’re right. It’s nothing new, right? Sometimes it’s, you know, it evolves in different ways, but there’s not really many new things in the if we’re really being honest. You know, it’s just evolution and we, different wording and descriptions of it and different approaches maybe. But it’s all kind of very similar. But I, I think it goes to the, the, the first part I thought of was this, is that it’s a fear. Mm-hmm. A fear of failure. A fear of, you know, well, what if I do this and it doesn’t work? How am I gonna be perceived? People worry about, you know, the perception of them and, you know, perspective and perception people have, you know, from others, he goes, no one wants to, you know, whether we like to admit or not, no one wants to look bad. Jason Stacy (16:44): Like go out there and put yourself out there and it fail. Obviously we don’t want that. You know what I mean? We don’t want to see like, we’re trying our best and it doesn’t work. ’cause then it hurts our identity. So people lock in too much of, you know, their identity with what they’re, you know, they’re doing, whether it’s success or failure. There’s, nowadays it’s even harder because everything on social media and online is about, everyone’s so successful, it’s so easy. And here’s your, I did these three steps and now I have everything and all this kind of, you know, this facade of, of how things work. So I really think there’s this fear, and, and the, and the issue is, and this is something with arena, you know, the, the tennis squad I’ve been working for years now is, and a lot of them actually is, is the, the thing that gets them past. Jason Stacy (17:20): And that next level is them realizing that it is fear that’s stopping them, right? There’s this threat, this fear, right? Versus, you know, that kind of threat versus challenge kind of concept, right? So most people are in this, in this threat state where their, their fear of whether it’s fear of failure, whether being seen a certain way, whether of, you know, it is a bit scary to do something new. You know, there’s a lot of layers of fear. The, the, the main part is you have to learn how to deal with fear, right? You have to face fear. You can’t wait for it to go away. You can’t, um, you know, get busy doing other things to think it’s gonna get, you know, kind of work your way around it. There is something that all of us know, all of us know that’s holding us back, right? Jason Stacy (17:59): Everyone knows may, maybe it’s hard for them to see it right now, but deep down inside, if they really be honest with themselves, they know what’s holding them back. What are they worried about? What are they scared about? And if they’re having trouble doing that, find people around them to help them realize what those things are. And then they need to face those things. They need to turn around, open their eyes and go through it. The only way to get through fear and to get to that next level is to go through it. There’s no going around it. There’s no waiting, there’s no, you know, buying a bunch of little mini courses or doing this little thing or doing a little of that. You know what I mean? Like, that doesn’t work. It doesn’t work. Just like you said, you’re talking about getting fit and healthy and diets. Jason Stacy (18:33): I mean, how many seven step programs to making a million dollars or your bestselling book, or your diet or your work app, there’s thousands of them. And if they all worked, and then why are there thousands of them? Why do we keep buying more and more every year? Well, because they don’t work. And I mean, they might work, but they don’t work because people are missing first this element we’re talking about, like, are they really being honest with themselves, that commitment to doing and committing to doing these things? The other is those three elements that you mentioned about, what I really focus on is managing your energy, your environment, and your emotions. Like for me, those are the things that, that’s the glue that holds all that together. That’s the fundamental stuff that people don’t work on, right? Mm-hmm . Because that’s what we’re talking about right now. Jason Stacy (19:12): Like commitment over compliance, you know, that vulnerability, maturity that, you know, understanding, you know, how you work that self-awareness, those three elements, without those you can buy and do every course you want. You could do all the steps and you might get some success, but you’re never gonna sustain it. You’re gonna be a one hit wonder, right? And that one hit isn’t gonna hit what it should have. And it could have because you’re just copy and pasting, you know, you’re just typing into something, see what chat GPT told you, and you’re just gonna follow the steps and hey, ta-da. It’s all magic. And again, some people might get a little bit further on, but they’re just gonna go right back to where they were. They’re not gonna keep growing. They’re not gonna keep going through this because it’s just, it’s not real. It’s not coming from inside from them. Jason Stacy (19:51): You know? It’s that, that analogy of like, you know, before you ever drive a stick, a manual, right? You, you know, you have the knowledge of what you’re supposed to do, right? You know, pushing the clutch, you know, the gears and all that stuff. But it doesn’t matter how much you memorize it, you know, it, you can recite it, you can explain it a hundred different ways to like 10 different languages. As soon as you get behind the car, the first time you’re jerk and stalling, you know, and you’re, you’re killing the engine and you’re, you know, ’cause that’s a different level of understanding. That’s experience and understanding. And so that’s the part that gets missing. And, and though I honestly believe over my own personal experience, my professional experience and all the different people I’ve helped become, you know, world champions in sport who’ve, you know, started businesses and became successful, all them, the main focus wasn’t here’s the details system that you need to follow. Jason Stacy (20:33): Like we find some that fits you, right. Find a system that fits you and your environment and where you are right now, right. And your resources and things that connect with you. That’s great. Find that. But that system’s only gonna go so far if you don’t know how to manage your emotions. Mm-hmm. Because that’s part of that commitment over compliance part, isn’t it? Right. That resistance, that fear that whatever the hesitation that you have or maybe that like, you know, oblivious thing that you think everything’s perfect and you’re amazing and you’re not really Right. , you have things to work on. Maybe it’s the other side of that coin, you know, managing your emotions, I said is a big part. Managing your energy. So your internal energy, your mental energy, your physical energy, you know, managing that, because that’s a key part. Because it doesn’t matter how switched on you are, how good you are, you are, you know, if you’re mentally, emotionally, physically fatigued, you’ll manage that energy. Whatever you do is gonna be, you know, half-assed. It’s not gonna be very effective. AJV (21:21): Yes. I have a question about that. So, because I think this is a really big topic in a lot of different, uh, circles right now. Sure. What would you say are the best things that you’ve seen work to help people manage their energy? Jason Stacy (21:36): Sure. I think, I think the first thing, I mean, the first thing is obvious, always acknowledging it. Like it’s actually a key thing. You know, more than your, your systems and your time. I, I would say I always start with the physical things, right? Because the thing about doing something that’s more tangible and physical that is in your control, no matter what your mood is, right? No matter how you’re feeling right now. So I’ll give you an example. Like, let’s say it’s a very simple example, how I breathe mm-hmm . Like, I can get you to breathe a certain way right now, and you’re gonna get, you know, if I say, let’s say we do some, I don’t know, some meditative yoga type breathing, you know, where we’re like breathing, like really in, in slowly hold your breath and have really long slow exhales, you know, we get more parasympathetic. Jason Stacy (22:15): I, I can explain how that works later if you want. But, you know, having like longer exhales, it becomes more parasympathetic. You’re more in that rest, relax, you know, digest, you know, you’re more sort of aware of where you are. You’re more aware of your body or your surroundings. So we can spend five minutes just breathing nice and slow. Now how are you gonna feel at after we, if we do this breathing for real, you know, if you just switch off everything, no noise, no distraction, and you just breathe real slowly, how you gonna feel? Are you gonna feel fired up? Like you’re ready to go? Like, fight Dante on the world? You jumping up and down screaming, of course not right? You gonna be like, just calm and relaxed. Ah, and that was just from changing how you breathe. If I get you breathing really, really fast right now, just even just on your own, just breathing really fast and all crazy, are you gonna feel all relaxed and calm? Jason Stacy (22:57): Of course you will. Yep. Yeah. Right. If I have you take a deep exhale everything and hold your breath as long as you can, and keep it, keep holding as long as you, as long as you can, you’re gonna be calm and relaxed, you’re gonna be stressing out. So just by some physical thing, simple as breathing, it’s gonna change how you’re feeling. This makes sense. Mm-hmm . So that’s, and that’s how you’re feeling. That’s big part of how you manage your energy, right? So understanding, and my, and my biggest point of that is if I do something physical, how I move my body, how I stand, if I do some, some mobility, some slow moving, you know, tai chi or yoga or what, whatever you want to call it, right? Versus if I stood up right now running places fat, I can for 10 seconds, I’m gonna be a different person for that moment, right? Jason Stacy (23:33): Afterward, right. My state, my energy, my focus, my intention is all gonna be in a different place based on how I just, what I did with my body. And, and the reason I like to talk more about that is that is again, like how I feel doesn’t matter, right? I need to get something done. Mm-hmm . I need to, I have to, I have to face something. I’m in the middle of something, something’s approached me, good or bad, opportunity, obstacle, whatever the thing is. If I need to be in a certain state, I need to manage my energy as best I can. I always start with a physical because that’s in my control, no matter how I feel, right? No matter my mood, no matter what’s going on. Now, yes, it’s difficult sometimes to do those things if you’re in a certain mood or a certain state of mind, right? Or an environment. But that’s just the, that’s just the, it takes a little bit of discipline to build the habit, right? That’s AJV (24:18): Good. Yeah. Jason Stacy (24:19): So it just takes a little bit of discipline to do what you need to do regardless how you’re feeling. So I would say the managing energy part is just being aware. There’s a lot of things. I mean that I, I, I know I harped on that for a while, but, you know, the breathing’s a big part. So at the end of the day, I do a thing called legs up breathing. So with all my athletes, all my people, at the end of the day or end of a match or after end of like a, maybe you have an intense session of like some new thing with your business and you guys have just been going for hours and you’re just, you know about to your, your head’s about to explode and you’re exhausted. Just go lay down, throw your legs up on the couch, you know, or up on a wall and just breathe and just, just try to let your head and relax your neck, relax, get it sink into the floor and focus on having really slow long exhales. Jason Stacy (24:57): Just sit there and anything goes in your head, just let it come, come and go. Don’t try to think about anything. Don’t not think about anything. Just let it happen. Whatever happens, and just sit there for four or five minutes, two minutes if that’s all you have, right? And that just resets a lot of things in your body. Gives you a moment because it works and kind of recharge one with your legs up. It takes a lot of stress off your heart, off your system. You getting on that blood flow back. You know, two, that breathing, that, that slower exhale for example, is, that’s one example. Is it you become more parasympathetic. So you know, that sort of more relaxed and calm sort of state versus fight, fight fear, which is probably what you’ve just been doing for the last two hours. You know? So you’re kinda resetting your nervous system kind of going, okay, let’s just reset for a moment. And if you do those little mini breaks throughout the day, those things add up. So if you have those little, whether you can pull your legs up or not, but even just take that time out to breathe, to slow yourself down, to get off your phone, to switch off your head. Even if it’s two minutes, you know, I’ll, I’ll tell you a quick story. Um, if I’m going too fast, lemme know. ’cause I get very excited about this stuff. . No, AJV (25:58): I think this is great. I think, you know, I think with the, the biggest kind of takeaway that I’m pulling from this, and then I want you to share, uh, the quick story. But it’s like, so much of this requires you to pay attention to yourself. Jason Stacy (26:09): A hundred percent. Thank you. Oh my God, that is so amazing. Exactly. All of everything that we have to do, and everything I talk about it starts with you or looking at yourself in the mirror, you know, like that, that self-awareness and there’s ways of developing your body tells you a lot of things before you realize it. There’s even studies now that have shown that our brain is reacting to something before it actually happens, right? Before it actually happens. Almost like we’re in this like weird live TV delay thing where our brain is just, just a moment before something happens, it’s a responding to it. So you know what, the more aware you can become of what your body’s telling you the be and, and, and, and of your environment, which we haven’t even broken down that at all. But like, the environment’s a huge part, you know, of being able to know how to manage your energy. Jason Stacy (26:49): So managing energy, I think is start with the physical, tangible things. You know, you understand that how you move your body and how you breathe is going to either use energy or restore energy, right? It’s gonna recharge you or it’s gonna drain you. It’s gonna put you in a state of alertness and hyper, you know, readiness or it’s gonna be calm and more relaxed. Like all these different, I mean, go on and on and on. And so again, you have control of that. And so the quick story I have is, I, I remember I had this space for a couple years. I was teaching a couple different schools and universities. I was coaching on the side, I was doing mentoring, I was teaching juujitsu, I was doing all these different things. And um, plus I had all my kids and they’re all very busy. I’m always very, very engaged with those guys. Jason Stacy (27:24): And, um, you know, I would, I had this little thing, and I have this issue with sleeping. I sleep a couple hours a night, you know, like sometimes even when I go to sleep, my body doesn’t like switch off. I have some things I have to work on with that. ’cause it’s, it’s not great, but been that way for a very long time. And I would do something instead of having like this monophasic bit of sleep. So like one big block of sleep and every, you know, we all do, like the nighttime we have our seven to nine hours is I wasn’t getting any sleep. So throughout the day I’d have these little mini breaks. Hmm. So let’s add like four different places to go to that, you know, for work, for teaching, coaching, et cetera. And before I got there, I’d say I’d drive to the plates, I’d sit in my car for, I’d turn everything off. Jason Stacy (28:00): So it’s just quiet. And I’d sit there for however much every time I have two minutes, five minutes, 10 minutes, and I would just chill, just breathe. And I try not to think about anything. And if I do, I just let it kind of float in and outta my head. And then I, and I, I had this visualization in my head, like, okay, whether I had an alarm on in case I fell, fell asleep. I, i soon as I had to get outta the car, I opened the door. As soon as I closed the door, it was like a light switch in my mind. I go, boom, boom, and I’m ready. As soon as I walk in the door, I’m just so on fire, so focused. I’m just, I’m a hundred percent just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. And then I get to my car afterward and I sit there, I’m like, oh my God. Jason Stacy (28:29): I’m just, I’m just done. I’m exhausted. And I, I’ll spend two minutes there before I drive, and then I drive to the next place and I do the exact same thing before I get outta my car. I reset, I breathe, I chill, I have a, a nap. If I had 10 minutes, 15 minutes, whatever. And then as soon as I walk in the door truck, close my car door, it’s like a light switch, a click, everything turns off and I go, Hmm. Because again, nothing else matters except for what I’m doing right now. If you like, you and aj, you’re spending your time to, you know, let me come and talk and share and all this stuff. Like how could I not be 100000% here for you right now? Like, how disrespectful is that to myself and to you and to everyone else. Like, it has to be that way. And so for me to have the energy, I had to find a way to fit in those little gaps to like kind of reset, recharge so that way I was a hundred percent engaged with whatever I needed to do. You know, AJV (29:12): Sorry for you really quick. Something just dawned on me. Sure. Um, because there is such a systemic problem, I think, in life. Sure. ’cause it doesn’t matter if it’s at home or at work with, uh, multitasking. Jason Stacy (29:27): Yes. Yeah, yeah. AJV (29:28): Right. It’s like we’re so busy that you can’t just do one thing. Sure. And I’m just curious like how much of that is what’s draining our imagery? Because it’s like if you, if you really had the ability to only be like, Hey, what’s the most important thing? It’s the thing I’m doing right now, and it gets all my focus. Sure. And it seems like your entire body, your entire being can go in one direction. But if you’re trying to do this, like, I was just thinking of like some of my days where it’s like, I have the kids in the back, right? I’m doing business calls on the phone, I’m driving, like I’m, I’m doing a hundred things at the same time. And then it’s like, I’m like, huh, I’m so tired Jason Stacy (30:06): . AJV (30:07): So much of that is because it’s like I’m not doing any one thing at the same time. And I’m just curious, like how much of that is a, a real stressor for your energetic being? Jason Stacy (30:20): I think all the above. I, I, I think, you know, look, the reality is, especially when we have families and businesses and, you know, obligations and all these different things, I think the, the first part is just to understand like, there’s obviously gonna be times where that’s how it is. You know, you gotta call, you have to take, and you just pick the kids up from school and there’s this sport thing and there’s this and that. And like, you know, sometimes it, it’s gonna happen. So I think that’s a big part of just being able to manage your energy is understanding like, look, that’s how it’s gonna be that way sometimes. And, and this, there’s gonna be these moments where it is gonna be a bit more chaotic. There’s gonna be things that’ll come up that weren’t in your control. The timing was off. And so instead of, you know, having that be like a burden, you know, and it’s a weight, you know, you can save some of that energy and that resource by not stressing that you’re stressing, right? Jason Stacy (31:01): Mm-hmm. Not stressing about the fact that you’re doing this thing. Because that often I think is the worst part is, is the, the thought that we know that we’re doing something or that we know that it’s too much or that, you know, we overthink this a little bit. So I think that’s a big step of managing your energy in that sense, is just accepting the fact, look, sometimes it’s gonna be this way. Yeah. Now the next thing though is going okay, it doesn’t mean you just allow it to happen and don’t have control over that and don’t, you know, create the environment where you can have your moments at least, right? Where that is your time to, to be able to switch off again, it takes practice. You have to learn how to do that, right? And, and, and so, you know, if you go and say multitasking, we have to do all the a hundred different things, that’s great. Jason Stacy (31:38): But I’m sure you’ve heard this before, it’s like, well, are you looking to just get something done, like half as it get it out, tick a box like everybody else, right? Or are you trying to be the best at what you do? Are you trying to get really good at what it is you’re trying to learn? Or what you’re trying to get to? Are you wanting to really be seen as like, you know, and even the thing is, this goes back to lying to yourself. If I’m just half-assing on a bunch of different things, right? And I kind of glued it together really quick, right? When it comes down to the, the big moments, right? Of, of knowing and believing in yourself. Like you already know you’re full of. Excuse my language. Like you already know, right? Because you know, you’ve can, you know, you’ve kind of half-assed in this. Jason Stacy (32:16): You kind of put that together, you know, you didn’t give it your best, right? Mm-hmm . So when it comes down to it, it, it’s like, if I easier analogy is like with training, if, you know, if, if arena who, you know, I don’t know if you guys know, you know, slink, she’s world number one tennis player. I’ve been with her like six, seven years. You know, if she knows that, if, if our practice, our training, if she was kind of not really committed to it, not really focused, not really there, you know, when she shows up on the court and there’s a very stressful moment, a lot of pressure, she’ll fall apart somewhere inside of her. Her, you can’t lie to yourself. You can try to pretend to, but when it comes down to it, it’s gonna show up. Yeah. And it’s gonna show up in the times that you don’t want most.